Rigorous Honesty The big book of Alcoholics Anonymous describes how addictive thinking  convinces the addict that they can manage their own recovery.  In the chapter of How It Works it is written, half measures availed us nothing, we stood at the turning point.  This means to recover from any type of addiction you have to […]

The failure of early narcissism leads to shame. Shame is an unmet childhood need and when a child grows up and becomes an adult, the need grows until it is fulfilled by someone or by some behavior.
When a narcissistic adult feels a negative emotion, they will act out with alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling, shopping, etc. over the unmet needs related to shame. Even when they have a positive emotion, they may act out, feeling they don’t deserve to have goodness and positivity in their lives.

Addiction is a futile attempt to get a person’s needs met. In fantasy a person can control the situation and never have to feel they’ve failed. People have affairs and act out sexually because it’s a controllable situation, “I get my needs met and don’t have to deal with the demanding chaos at home.”