Devil versus Angel: The War of Addiction
A soldier is vulnerable when the enemy weakens the defenses that keep him safe. Hungry, angry, lonely, tired, restless, irritable and discontent weaken the defenses of the addict. Lust, pride, and resentments fuel the fire, confronting the trigger toward relapse. All of a sudden, the soldier faces a challenge of the devil versus the angel.
Imagine how strong the soldier is when he is not vulnerable; when he’s feeling content, emotionally sober, and connected. It’s as if, the more he stays connected to others and uses his recovery tools, the more defenses he builds in his arsenal and the stronger he becomes in fighting the war. Slipping and relapsing is like getting injured in the war. It is not part of recovery. Emotional sobriety keeps the addict safe from allowing vulnerability to weaken leading to acting out sexually.
As the war rages on, day after day, and the addict’s vulnerability weakens, the “devil on his shoulder” whispers in his ear, “you’ll feel better if you do it, just one more time, nobody will know, you’re not hurting anyone.” After all, you might lose this battle, but you haven’t lost the war, yet.
This is the critical moment in the addict’s battle. Even though he may be vulnerable, he accesses the “angel on the other shoulder” to talk back to the devil. “I’m going into battle today. I may have some scars but you’re not going to win this war. My defensive posture is strong; no social media, filters on my electronics, going to 12-step meetings and process groups, having a sponsor, exercising, reading recovery material daily. These are the addict’s weapons in the war against the “devil.”
The “angel” dispels the notion of the devil. The guilt and shame will not be worth the few minutes of pleasure, your partner will be mad at you for weeks and now you have to go to more meetings each week and pay the therapist to get help, AGAIN!
Beginning Today: Put yourself in the role of the warrior. Everyday imagine girding yourself up for battle by saying, today I will fight my battle head on by avoiding landmines, booby traps & slippery slopes. I will use my recovery tools as my weapons against the devil clawing at my shoulder and fight back by employing my consequential angel to refute the illogical appeal of the cunning, baffling, and powerful devil.
There is no room for complacency on the battlefield when your life is on the line. The disease of addiction is the perpetual battle in your head between giving in to the allergy of lust and facing the consequences of injury on the battlefield.