Therapists' Sex Addiction Toolkit

Over the years I’ve developed visual aids and exercises to help clients more easily understand the essential elements of sex addiction therapy.  These CBT, DBT and experiential exercises will enhance your clients’ experience and help you, the clinician, offer an easy and natural way for clients to go deeper in their process and heal sooner, rather than later.  Look over the list below of 21 exercises, audio and recovery kits and you’ll realize how beneficial this will be for you and your clients. 

Toolkit Exercises, Audio and Recovery Kit

Mindmaps

Mindmaps are diagrams in which information is represented visually, usually with a central idea placed in the middle and
associated ideas arranged around it 

Shame Mindmap  

Feelings, Behaviors, Thoughts, and Values which evolve over time due to shame. Mindmap can be adapted to use with terms like addiction, fear, consequences, relapse, serenity, etc. Great for group participation. 

Attachment Theory

Attachment Styles Graph

This graph, which can be made into a poster, is perfect for explaining attachment styles and how they affect self-image, negotiation techniques, sexuality and addiction. Based on clinical research articles. 

Attachment Perspective on Intimacy

Attachment Addiction Graph

Based on clinical research articles these two attachment perspectives go together to explain the connection between attachment styles and intimacy.  

Graphics that Clarify Sex Addiction

2 Paths to Addiction

A visual representation of the two paths leading to sex addiction, 

Neglect leading to entitlement and emotional distance leading to low self-esteem. 

Boiling Pot Analogy

This graphic shows the elements that “raise the temperature” over time and eventually lead to acting out (boiling over). Elements include lust, restlessness, irritability, discontentment, fear and resentment.

Five Circles 

How pain and suffering are rooted in mental obsessions and spiritual maladies which cause a person to act out. 

I can’t vs. I don’t

A simple representation of two concepts.  I can’t act out anymore versus I don’t act out anymore.  
Great for group warm-ups. 

Sex Addiction Sociometry

An experiential sociometry exercise to help clients identify their rationalizations and excuses for acting out.

Healthy Intimacy for Couples

This 12 page booklet explains healthy intimacy, what
blocks intimacy, how to deepen intimacy, the 4 phases of love, what works, the eight stages of intimacy, FANOS, Acceptance,
Developing Healthy intimacy, Healthy sex vs. sex addiction.  

Relationships 

Answering the Why Question

The most common question clinicians receive from betrayed partners. Here are the answers. 

 

Relational Blind Spots

The inability to experience joy and healthy relationships due to these blind spots 

Inner Child 

Inner Child Trauma

An exercise for individuals or group analyzing the rules and roles growing up, the defenses used for survival, medicators and resources.  Clients fill in the squares and create their own story. 

Belief Systems

Behavior Change – Abuse

Behaviors that need to change and how to know if an abuser has changed.  

Glass Half Empty or Full

Graphic explaining the two neuro pathways that signal depression and anxiety and what the solution is

Happiness Maze

A maze graphic with happiness in the middle where each dead end is a negative emotion or behavior which blocks your client from getting to happiness. 

The Negative Belief Buster

An experiential exercise identifying limited beliefs from childhood and how
these beliefs affect communication issues in a relationship.  Very eye opening for clients. 

Changing Limiting Beliefs Worksheet

Using NLP techniques, this worksheet changes limiting beliefs by helping the client dig deeper into the fear of changing that belief to be more positive. 

Writing Exercises

Because Worksheet

An experiential exercise to help clients dig deeper into their belief systems.  Same
questions are: 

I don’t show my emotions because people will take advantage of me

I sabotage my life because
I don’t know how to be happy. 

I am afraid to take risks because I’m afraid of failure. 

Writing Exercises to promote insight and wellness

Fill in the blanks, Word Clusters, Six word stories, Writing the Wrongs and Writing the Rights, Metaphors

Let’s Play Therapist 

A group exercise where group members explore consequential questions with each other like…

What happens when you get the feeling you want to act out sexually or watch porn? 

What’s the benefit to continue to act out in your
addiction? (nothing is not an acceptable answer)
and 38 more.  

Audio

Urge Surfing

4 minutes and 32 second audio to help clients “surf their urges” when they are triggered. 

A great preventative measure for clients to practice each day.